Why the Judgment?

Have you read any of the press about Guiliana Rancic’s comment that she puts her marriage before her baby? More importantly, have you read the comments section of the articles? The comments are cruel, unfair, judgmental.

If you like, you can read one of the many articles and comments here:
http://moms.today.com/_news/2013/03/02/17163522-giuliana-rancic-puts-marriage-first-child-second?d=1

Unfortunately this is a sad part of parenting. Fellow parents are so quick to judge and criticize kver silly things. I see it everywhere. In the media, in the comments sections of news articles and blogs and in my own hometown. I know I personally have been whispered about at my sons’ elementary school as “oh, his mom works.” As if it explains every minor transgression my child has ever made. I have had a perfect stranger shout at me when my youngest was 2 and bolted away from me and ran into a busy parking lot before I could catch him. The stranger didn’t know that my son had never done that before and doesn’t know that he never did it again. Unfortunately, children don’t come out of the womb knowing that you shouldn’t run into a busy parking lot and lots of other things.

I understand the criticism when children are being neglected or mentally, physically, sexually or verbally abused. Those children need us to be their voices. To cry loudly when they have been treated unfairly. To ensure that we intervene on their behalves by calling the authorities or reporting abuse through hotlines. This is where we need to focus our attention and our voices.

Our children benefit when we lift each other up as parents. It’s a struggle to be a good parent on a daily basis. We all try to make good decisions and weigh the consequences of everything we say to our children and things that we let them do. I personally have benefitted from having a strong group of friends that I can rely on for solid advice. I can be honest with them about my struggles and my children’s struggles. They are always a good sounding board and helpful. And yes, sometimes they might even offer some criticism. Criticism, when it conmes from a good place, has helped me be a better parent.

Let’s focus on criticizing parents who are truly abusive and neglectful. Let’s report them and make a stronger effort to keep them safe.

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